KNUCKLE CHATTER

My fuzzy gloves that are fingerless
Send me palms over knuckles with digital bliss
On the winter days I’m earwax picking,
Scratching backs, guitar licking,
Pinching jacks, popping pimples,
Cleaning braces, poking dimples,
Tying laces, tickling bellies,
Needle threading, tasting jellies,
Rabbit foot petting, booger flicking,
Yo-yo twirling, paper football kicking,
Portraying a Shadow-Squirrel, snatching a donut hole,
Lapping cookie dough trails from Mom’s mixing bowl.
But when it’s really cold outside and time to shovel snow,
Mittens that cover my fingers are what I wish I had in tow.

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JANE CHANGER

There’s nothing in this world
more sweet than Sarah Jane –
except when she gets hangry,
then her sweet goes down the drain.

See, “Hanger” is an emptiness
bigger than a garage for a plane,
a vacuum in the stomach
that grumble rumbles to the brain.

And when hangriness descends
upon sweet Sarah Jane,
her sugar turns to salt –
and mountains of it, not a grain.

She snarls and barks
like an angry Great Dane,
fuses bulge in her neck
where normally there’d be veins.

But when again her belly’s full
she goes from hangry back to sane,
and to the world returns
sweet little Sarah Jane.

ROLLS OF DELIGHT

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In the supermarket there is one aisle
That is my favorite by a mile.

It’s not where they sell sugary snacks,
Soda, cereal or have the toy racks.

It’s near the sponges, past the Kleenex,
A cottony wonder from floor to apex:

It’s Toilet Paper Mountain, in all its glory,
Beside Paper Towel Castle,
which everyone must see.

But for me, I’m afraid, seeing’s not enough.
I have to scale these towers of puff.

Mom and Dad don’t like when I climb,
They put me back in the cart every time.

Then I’m apart from my grocery store friends:
Paper Towel Castle and Toilet Paper Mountain.

And I must turn to plotting for the next time
That to those absorbent summits I can climb.

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JOY OF X

It marks the spot
From the last it is third
But for x-ray
It starts almost no words.

Expunges
Expires
Examines
Extolls

Elixir, a mixer
Ex post facto.

In both cases it looks the same
Like Cousin C
It’s a cross only not straight up
Like Cousin T.

Explaining
Exerting
Expatriating

Extant, exacting
Exasperating

There’s no alphabet king
No one “Letter Rex”
But in Alphabetowne
There’s no one quite like X

SELF PROPELLED

A balding billygoat
Bought a new billy-weave,
Now he’s happy as a lonely coral who joined a reef.

A homeless cuckoo
Asked for the time,
And found a roof in a clock that now he calls “mine.”

My hooks were a mess
Till I hung’em on a hook,
My nooks all misplaced, then I stored’em in a nook.

So asking and acting
Proves, as you can see:
“If it’s going to be, it’s up to me.”

selfpropelled_edit

ZIPPITY DO DOC

There are dentists everywhere
But not the kind I’d like to be,
That’s the kind who earns a living
Mending broken zipper teeth.

‘Cause as far as I can tell
Right now there’s no doc you can see
Who can take a fly or jacket that
Won’t move and set it free.

So the Earth’s first zipper dentist
Is what I would like it to be:
The foremost expert on the planet’s
Mechanical metal teeth.

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ED-ITATION

“Ol’ Ed Reed starts with an Ed
And ends with an Ed….
Is that right, Fred?”
“That’s right,” said Fred.

“It’s why all his friends
Call him ‘Bookends’
As a nickname
Because his edges are the same.”

I asked him, “Ed
Whendja get it in yer head
Thatcha start with an Ed
And end with an Ed?”

He said, “’Twas plain to see
The first day I could read
The combo ‘E-D’
I had two of’em in me.”

“Well shucks, Golly!”
I said to Ed Reed,
“Lose that ‘R-E’
And you’ll be Tidy Ed Ed!”

He said, “No thank ye, sir,
I’d much prefer
To finish how I started:
Two ‘Eds’ by one ‘Re’ parted.”

SHORT STORY

Dad said,
“Summer’s out of mothballs, kids!”
We said,
“What does that even mean?”

He laughed,
“Go check out the clothesline!”
We did,
And this is what we seen:

A parade of tan,
red and seersucker,
Madras, orange,
navy and plaid.

We can’t ever recall
a sign of summer
That’s made us kids
feel so sad.

shorts_editMAN O’WARDROBE

Hhhooray!

H is a letter that sounds like a word
spelled a-t-c-h-e,
that looks like one rung on the alphabet ladder
that stretches from A to Z.

H can give a lift
even when h is small,
and resembles
a ladderback chair,

So when H appears
Instead of “Ho-hum,”
Think,
“A humble helping hero is here!”

REPEAT: THE QUESTION

Would Wood
Rob rob
chilly chili
in Inn
Four ‘fore
dear deer
paws’ pause
cause caws
cliques clicks
where ware
bare bear
steer steer
hare hair
to two
bored Board
Principals principles?

Or, 

Might that stiff, Bob, steal frosty meat stew while attending Hotel Quattro before the ceased moving of precious hart feet prompts rhythmic ticking noise from crow-based social clubs in the same vicinity that surly, difficult longhorns short on merchandise guide rabbit fur in the direction of a couple disinterested governing school administrators fundamental beliefs?

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Making of THE REDUN DANCE – Notes from the first draft, written March 8, 2012 – more than a year before any of this here tweed saw the light of day.  (Photo: PaC)

BELLY, BELLY

Dad had many sayings:
By George!
By Jove!
Great Scott!
and
No matter what you think,
There is a lid for every pot!

But we knew we’d really boiled
His patience into jelly
When with wide eyes he whispered,
By Roosevelt’s horse’s belly!

We don’t know where it came from
We don’t know what it meant
Except it was time for our
Misbehaving to relent.

T.R., I bet, would dig the line
Most likely, too, his horse.
His horse’s belly would think it
Poetry, of course

Even better than the classic
One-worder of Ted’s, “Bully!”,
Its cousin, Dad’s much longer fave,
“By Roosevelt’s horse’s belly!”

SMALL DETAIL

Before Mama went out
she said to the sitter

“If you please, I’ll need you
to make the kids’ dinner.

They’ll eat anything
so it should be easy.

Oh, but try not to make
anything that’s too greasy.

Other than that, really,
anything will do.

But. . .things with strong smells
they’ll spit back with a Peeee-uuuuuu!

Otherwise, trust me,
it won’t be hard,

Juuust – don’t try to serve
food that comes from a jar.

And best not to try fooling,
their jar-dar is keen.

And if she senses any tricks
the little one gets mean.

But I mean it, they’ll eat whatever
And if they fuss, don’t take it.

Though should they ask for a thing you don’t know
I’d learn quickly how to make it.”

How fast that sitter could learn to cook
I guess we’ll never know

But out through an open window
We’re certain she could quickly go.

PRECISION MATTERS

It could be the space at the back of a car

It could be the spine of a tree,

It could contain a clog of elephant snot

or treasure lost under the sea.

Which proves that descriptions sometimes

Are all we have to not be sunk

Because on highways, in forests, in jungles, ‘neath oceans

A trunk’s not a trunk’s not a trunk.

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SO WHICH IS IT: Monster Shadow or Shadow Monster? (Photo – PaC)

PUDDLE VISION

When storm clouds clear
And Mom lets us outside
There’s just one thing that I see,
I’ll confide:

Not rainbows, although,
They’re certainly pretty.
Not the fresh sunbeams
That are drying the city.

Not the wet worms
Not the drenched cars or trees,
Not the once again buzzing about
Birds or bees.

While all of that stuff
Might make others’ focus muddled,
After rainstorms I only
Have eyes for puddles.

And when I get home
None of me clean or dry
Mom shakes her head
And wonders why,

“Why is it in puddles
You must run with such glee?”
“I can’t help it,” I say,
“They’re all that I see.”

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MERRY LITTLE PUDDLE JUMPER – Ocean City, NJ 2015 (Photo – PaC)

 

THE LOOKS AROUND

There are almost no places
Where there are no faces
Even in the cases
Of in-between spaces

Like the Frowning-Big Tree
His acting has no range
Which isn’t so strange:
Bark expressions don’t change.

Or the Tractor-Wheel Elf
While his view always spins
That strong rubber chin
Won’t let sickness set in.

Perry is the given name
of Snowy-House Face.
While the world to summer always wants to race
He for hot weather forever must brace.

Yes, even while you
sit at work thinking
The-Face-In-The-Drop-Ceiling-Tiles
is blinking.

Take it from me
the Garden-Stone Grump
I may look like a rock-headed chump
But I’ve gathered perspective here from my rump:

Ungaze from the obvious, like Mr. Moon,
Don’t let on the foreground your focus last
And slowly at first but before long fast
Will appear all the faces you used to rush past.

NOTE:  To see this poem with photos in the STELLER STORY format in which it originally appeared, click here.  

WALKY TALK

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TO SEE THIS WALKOPHONOUS POEM & COLLAGE AS PART OF THE #STELLER STORY IN WHICH THEY WERE ORIGINALLY POSTED, CLICK HERE. 

If my footsteps,

(Fall crunch: over leaves)

Were able to talk,

(Winter crisp: on snow)

The sound of their words,

(Spring slosh: through puddles)

Would depend when I walk.

(Summer scratch: sandy toes)

METS BRAIN FEVER

Hey, Mets.
Go? Let’s.
Hit’em long,
Throw’em strong,

Leather, flash,
Bases dash,
Play ball,
All fall.

So Mr. Met
Must never fret,
Think magic numbers & old tricks,
Like Sixty-Nine & Eighty-Six.

If fortunes stray,
For miracles pray
When hope is nada,
Believe, ya’ gotta,

Yes, Mets.
Get it, let’s:
A pennant pretty,
New for Citi.

Then stay sound,
From the mound,
The rubber, toed,
The batters, mowed,

The flames dealt,
The lineups melt.
That’s how it’s been
When it’s amazin’:

Gems hurled,
To the Series, World,
Cool as Vlassic
In the Classic.

Show no quit
In the books, put it.
Not a bit of fade,
‘Till there’s a parade.

Woo-hoo,
Orange and blue,
Make a scene
Out in Queens

End our wait
To celebrate
Yo, Mets.
Go! Let’s!

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STILL HAVE my David Cone autographed 8×10 glossy, purchased at a baseball card show (what are those?!?) circa 1990. I can recall hearing on the radio that he’d been traded to the Blue Jays in August ’92. I was crushed.

While I can’t express as eloquently as others have the emotional roller-coaster of being a former die-hardI am very much in their tent when it comes to the New York Mets.  They were my first irrational sports love, and since then, have remained one of the teams that occupies a permanent place inside me.  Admittedly, and without shame, I’d call my Met fandom today a fraction of what it once was.  Now when I cheer, out of respect for the every day, pavement pounding, orange-and-blue collar fans, I cheer quietly ; in the same way many Catholics describe their faith, I say I’m lapsed.  But I also contend, as evidenced by the sporadic but unmistakeable ways that it surfaces every so often, that my Met-love won’t ever completely be gone.  Which is why since they won the National League last night for the 3rd time in my lifetime, only their fifth pennant in 53 seasons, I’ve had Mets on the brain, dripping in bits and bursts into a notebook and then above. Somethings, when you learn them young enough, simply become a part of you.  They might fade like the snapshots in Back to the Future (sorry, Cubs fans), but in time, the real stuff always returns.

makE no mistakE

A-I-O and-U agree
in their eternal love for E,
that vitamin that helps the vowels
sound like who they be.

When a mat needs a mate
or a lobe comes from a lob,
when the slim become slime
that’s ol’ E on the job.

Who can make a rat rate?
can make a shin shine?
can make a hug huge?
or make a fin fine?

E looks like an afterthought
tacked there on the tail
but without E on occasion
the vowels self-esteem might fail.

So when tin must be a tine
When a lug must luge
When a pin need be pine
just one letter will do.

EvidEncE – Except in baseball, Es are tremendously helpful.

GOLD, FRANKINCENSE, AND MICHAEL McDONALD*

A Wise Man travelled
From Orient-are
Upon his arrival
He stopped in a bar.

On the stool beside him
Sat a Young Fool,
Short on knowledge of life,
If an expert in school.

The Fool talked a lot
Once their chat began,
He told the Wise Man
Of His “Full Proof Life Plan.”

“It may not be that easy,”
the smiling Wise Man said,
“Just do your best.
And you’ll have no cause to dread.”

“Of course I won’t, man!
This Plan is the best.
Feel free to borrow it.
Go ahead, be my guest!”

They went back and forth
And soon it was clear
To the Wise Man that this
Debate could go on years.

And that was a bummer
That no matter how wise
He was he couldn’t open
This poor Young Fool’s eyes.

But then in the course
Of tuning him out
The Wise Man detected
Some sweet music about.

The harmony keys
At first drew him in
Then he heard the lyrics
And they made him grin.

Their message was timely
And an inspiration
To a man full of wisdom
But not beyond frustration:

“What a Fool believes
a Wise Man has no power
to reason away.”
It made sweetness from sour.

This genius musician
His magical words.
The wisest thing, maybe,
The Wise Man had ever heard.

The song lifted his mood,
Made him feel alright.
From then on he didn’t care
If the Fool babbled all night.

No more was there pressure
To change his silly views.
“What this Fool believes,” he thought,
“That’s on him. Not you.

You’re a Wise Man with no
More power to reason
With this Fool than you have
To alter the seasons.”

This lesson from an
Invisible pop star
Was one he took home
That night from the bar:

What a Fool believes?
Not your problem, don’t fret.
There’s no reasoning with him.
At least, there’s never been yet.

*Both McDonald and Kenny Loggins have the songwriting credit on the Doobie Brothers classic linked above that inspired this story.  The assist goes to Gaspar, Balthasar, and Melchior, Kings though not Doobies.